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I was Possessed did a Crime did the Time and was Delivered

Posted on January 24, 2010

I am going to be honest: I do not truly care if anyone here believes my story. I would, however, hope that those who are overly skeptical would suspend disbelief and simply listen. I would also hope those who are over-eager to believe every bump in the night to be demonic mischief, that merely chanting magic words or holding a necklace can somehow bind what they believe demonic would calm their nerves and listen (read) as well.

I am no expert. Neither are you if you only grew up watching X-Files and regularly view FearNet or Syfy. I can only tell my story. Those close to me know this story is true, but it is difficult to tell others -they simply get freaked out or mentally deny it to protect their personal beliefs.

Why tell this, and why here? Well, I am not sure. As stated above, this is not something I can regularly talk about, it hurts people, and I try not to do so. I am shooting my story out there into the internet so that maybe someone with similar circumstances can relate, and somehow take away something useful.

This is a dual story of mental-illness and demonic oppression/possession. It is sometimes difficult to separate the two. I have, for myself.

I’ll start from the start, avoiding too much detail since it is sensitive to others and myself, I hope you can understand.

I was always a “sensitive” child. Easily frightened and angered. Had sleep terrors and problems sleeping. At a young age something spooked me. I was asleep, woke up at 2:00 AM on the dot, wide awake. A harsh frigid wind overcame me and it sounded like an electrical storm. My curtain did not budge as it swept over me and headed towards the window. I could never explain what that was, but it freaked me out.

Years later I became a very depressed person. I attempted suicide multiple times at a young age.

Into the teen years the depression became worse. I became a hermit, secluding myself from the world. I started to believe something was following me, and started looking for answers. I looked into the Bible, but rejected it in spite. I sought answers through unorthodox methods, and this only increased the feelings of paranoia and despair.

I messed with a Ouija board once, but got spooked and never used it again.

Years later I began to have serious health problems. This made things worse since the doctors could not solve my problems. They recommended seeing a psych, but I refused.

Eventually I became entirely despotic and desperate. I could not sleep. I was having nightmares every night. I was failing school. I was a mess. One day it all became too much, I was sick of the internal struggle, the evil I always felt never seemed to go away, and so in despair I gave up. I decided to end it all.

What happened next is demonic in nature.

I started to see “orbs,” not from taking photos, but right before my eyes. I started to hear voices. I had a psychotic break, and became a different person. In an attempt to end it all, I sadly attacked and killed someone dear to me. That person did nothing to cause this. There was no trigger, and no animosity towards that person at all. During the attack I was crying, screaming, laughing, and robotic. It was a complete system overload, I was possessed. It was a primal feeling of complete hatred and despair, a desire to remove all and everyone from the house, and then to self destruct. I did not understand what I was doing, and was only able to figure things out through years of treatment and personal soul searching.

I was sent to a prison/psych ward. I did ten years for manslaughter. Was given a break due to the complex psychological things that took place. I did not deserve such a break, but somehow, with the support of the victims, was able to get help rather than punishment.

During that 10 years, I tried to kill myself numerous times. The guilt was too much. That presence never left me, but I was determined to fight it or die.

I then turned to the Bible. I sought spiritual guidance. I read everything I could get my hands on when I could (due to the effects of the meds I was constantly on, this was difficult.)

Somehow, in the midst of cutting myself with paint-chips and burning my skin, something happened. I was able to see. The story of Christ, his victory, his blood being shed on Calvary, it caused a breakthrough. The guilt broke, my sanity returned, and much like the demoniac in Luke, I could sit in “my right mind.” Things were not easy sailing after this. I had a lot to work through, and much guilt to deal with. Needless to say, I eventually was healed, given a second chance at life, and was forgiven by those alive who I had harmed.

Here is the takeaway from this:

We do not fully understand paranormal things. No one truly does. I experienced it. I gave in to it. I ended up destroying a life. The only remedy I found was Christ. Not some magic, but a person. A person who knew me, my actions, my insanity, my affliction. This person healed me, day by day, month by month, year by year, until I was sane again. Him, and he alone fixed my problems. It was spiritual. Yes, I was mentally ill, but there was more to it. There was an evil presence, a presence bent on pure destruction. A presence that I could not understand, combat, or deal with. He alone had the ability to stop it, fight it, and remove it from me. How he did this? I have no clue. I am not God. I have come to believe that the human will is key. Everything in life is about our will. What we believe in, what we live for, etc. There are wills competing with and for ours. These wills are not always nice. Some, as was my case, are demonic. In such a case, as was mine, the only solution was to align the will (mine) with a will much more powerful, much more capable of dealing with said situation. I had to give in to God’s will. There are instances in the new testament where the demons flee from and fear the presence of Jesus. I trust him. I would hope anyone with a similar situation would do the following:

1.) Seek immediate medical help. Yes, doctors will sometimes treat you as a lab rat. Yes they sometimes will cause harm. Nonetheless, there very well could be severe mental health issues going on, and you will benefit from seeking help via doctors (meds and treatments) and Psychologists. If something truly demonic is going on, it will likely manifest itself through observable mental health issues. Do not be afraid of seeking out medical help. In fact, you will need it.

2.) You must choose to live. You must choose to fight. Your will and your life is at stake. In my case I chose to fight for the sake of those I harmed. It was enough to get me through some very hard times.

3.) You must also realize that YOU CANNOT DO THIS ALONE. Seek help from family, friends, and most importantly, SEEK SPIRITUAL HELP. It is not that pastors or priests are magic, in fact, most are utterly clueless. Many will ignore you and give you false advice. They, too, have seen too many horror films.

However, there ARE those out there who truly care, who can truly help you. They are strong willed individuals who will fight with and for you. I found many such individuals in prison, pastors and volunteers and such, who gave me far more help than I deserved. Their fighting alongside with me was key. They saved my life. They checked on me and guided me when crap hit the fan, which it did, all the time. You are most likely already beat up spiritually. Your will has been infected, and your system has been hacked. More importantly, something inside you WILLED for it to be so, WILLED to give in. You need to be purified by something more powerful than yourself, a will to push you in the opposite direction, and you will need the help of others. Hopefully, if you seek help, God will put those in your path to guide you along, this happened to me.

I am fine now. I live with burdens. I do not carry them alone. I was healed. Hopefully, you out there reading this, you can find some measure of comfort in my story. It ended horribly. Yes, I did take a life. Somehow, in spite of that, things turned for the better. Some would say I was just lucky, that somehow the system did not consume me. I would say, that crazy grace, and those miracles that are thrown around like clichés and are throughout the Bible, well, it still happens. It happened to me. Demons, though they are difficult to understand, are real. God, though he is difficult to understand, is real. I experienced both sides. I hope you never have to. But if you do, please take solace in this: “Greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world (1 John).”

The question is, who is in you? Is it the one who overcomes, or the one in this world? Answering and resolving that situation is the key.

Also, if someone has any questions, or if there is something I could elaborate on if it would help you, feel free to ask and I will relay my experiences and info. Like I said, I am not an expert. I am simply a survivor. Anything I can help you with, feel free to ask. It will only be from my own experiences.

Sent in by Bob, Copyright 2010 TrueGhostTales.com




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Tags: Oppression, Orbs, Ouija Boards, Possession


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Comments

32 Responses to “I was Possessed did a Crime did the Time and was Delivered”
  1. goththom says:

    That had to have been tough writing dow, I appreciate it. Just remember when the enemy tries to strike at you through guilt, that it’s been paid for by Jesus. We are all willing victims here in a world where we see very little of a larger more real unseen universe. You passed through the dark by clinging to the light, you made it through a horrible battle. Because your life counts, and God has plans for you, as he does for all of us. Be strong and seek him.And to anyone else who’s struggling out there, you are not alone, we’re in this together, and help is a prayer away. My love and blessings to you all.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Hi Bob, Its k2m from talk paranormal. Im glad you are sharing your story here. I havent been here in weeks. Im sure there are many who can learn a lot from your experience.

  3. voodoochile says:

    You are very brave for telling your story. I think a lot of people mistake possession for mental illness because they don’t believe in demon possession or even the devil . Even though the bible talks about him. Now you are free. Good luck.

  4. Anonymous says:

    So who’s live did you take? Were they dear too you?

  5. Lotus S. Dust says:

    how can i contact you? i dont think it would be right to put my email addy up here but there has to be a way. i thank you for telling your story & i forgive you. i have questions & need answers. a am a pastors daughter & i have been dealing with spiritual warfare my whole life>as long as i can remember & thats long. i will pray for you & ask you to do so in return. just some one let me know how i can contact Bob?……

    LSD

  6. Christina says:

    Bob, thanks for sharing. And, I believe completely as something similar happened to my brother when he was in gangs and just the type of person one would look at think that ‘this kid is hopeless’.

    He knew something evil was in him and so willing to lead him down the path of destruction. This evil appeard to him as a dark orb/presence and he felt this enter him one night, in his room. His temper became even worse than it had always been, to the point, that me his closest sister, was afraid of the brother I loved so dearly. He did things to others that were criminal, but as far as I know (he confided many things to me; more than most brothers would), he did not kill anyone…..he raped, maimed and more. To look into his eyes at that time, there was nothing there…….nothing.

    Someone did enter his life, a foster dad who somehow got to him and to whom he for once, listened to. My brother did find Him and his life started changing for the better. As he started changing his life around, the evil one came back to him and appeared as the only way my brother could describe him, as the horns and tails ‘thing’. This evil was upset because of the change taking place in my brother and wasted no time telling my brother that he (my brother) was his child and no one else’s……my brother denounced the evil and told him he was a child of God…..the evil one then proceeded to try and choke my brother. While this was happening my brother just kept repeating a prayer over and over and the evil one left. Not happily, but he did leave.

    To this day, I see my brother as an example of someone being so lost and void of human compassion at his worst, to being someone I look up to and admire……..through his changing to be a better person, he, (at the age of 19), became a father….twice (not planned), got married to the mom of his kids, and took on the challenges to better himself, fight off the evil and truly become a decent person.

    No one is ever truly lost, and what you said about the human will, is so very true. You have to WANT to do something about it…….although a tough road, much falls into place when you beleive you can change.

    As of this writing my brother celebrated his 30th wedding anniversary, retired after working for 31 years, (all at the tener age of 50, I might add) and became a grandpa for the first time!

    I wish you all the continued success in l ife, Bob.

    Christina

    • Sean says:

      Hi Christina,

      Congratulations on such a wonderful outcome. I am sure your brother was helped by having loving people such as you in his life as well as his stepfather. You should write your story here (as Bob did) , and if you can, get your brother to write as well.

      There are many that need to hear that victory is possible in this way, and there is no testimony more powerful than those that lived through it. Many of these stories end by people moving or otherwise running away, but for some people no escape is possible, and for these people, stories like yours can really help!

  7. eyepriestess says:

    Thanks for sharing your story Bob. I often wonder what i would have become if a demonic possession attempt had worked. This happened after playing with a ouija board, then i was attacked by something which entered my body, only prayer saved me from complete posession and the evil went.

    It makes you wonder how many people who have committed murders and people who are in psychiatric hospitals have sufferered demonic posession.

  8. Gregory Brown says:

    Bob,

    I read enough of your story to understand in part what happened. I’ve been mentally and emotionally ill since my wife walked out over 12 years ago. Therapy has educated me a bit. I’m still on medications. It took me a long time, a lot of study, but I finally identified a very specific kind of demon that was oppressing me. I don’t feel comfortable revealing that here.

    I went through a period of time doing things like cutting with razors. Then I started burning myself. Wasn’t totally sure why, just did it. I think I was trying to block one kind of pain with another kind of pain. It actually seemed to work temporarily.

    I was seeing a woman who did “healing touch” on me for some considerable time. During my last session something happened. I decided to let that thing on my back to express itself. It was a choice I made…, and it took control for a couple of minutes. Nobody got hurt. It wasn’t that kind of demon. Scared me a bit, and the therapist I’m sure. But it confirmed what I suspected, and I am keeping that to myself.

    Your loss was terrible. I understand about the “choice” affecting your behavior…, even if it was for just a short period of time. It wasn’t you that acted out the crime. I believe that. I do take comfort knowing that you have given your life to Christ. I hope the other victims have found forgiveness for you. It seems they have forgiven you.

    You are right about the issue of one’s “will.” I tried explaining that to someone recently. Even a believer must have control of one’s will to make the choice to surrender one’s life to Christ.

    Porn addicts, drug addicts, alcoholics, and many others effectively weaken or even cripple their own will. That is when the enemy strikes.

    Beside all that, I’ve been suffering chronic left side migraines since 1984. I suddenly developed an intense case of tinnitus just 3 days after my wife walked out. There is no cure. I stopped praying for healing the migraines after 10 years. The tinnitus developed in 1996, and I prayed for quite some time and simply accepted that God must think I can bear this. The Apostle Paul had a “thorn in the flesh.” He too prayed, and eventually accepted that his condition was allowed by God, and He would have to bear it.

    I’m in my fifties now. I’m past the half way mark. I’m looking forward. See you on the other side. If you get there before me, save me a seat!

  9. Gregory Brown says:

    Bob,

    For other readers’ sake, I wanted to add just one other thought.

    I think Christ was actually sweating blood while praying in the garden of Gethsemane just before being crucified, this was something He would rather have avoided…, when He said “let this cup pass from me.” I don’t recall all of that clearly. And He also said, “never the less not my will but thine be done.” I think this was the classic struggle between His flesh and His spirit. He was human. He was also God.

    So, there is the model. Anyone who wishes to examine it, get a Bible and look it up.

  10. Gregory Brown says:

    eyepriestess,

    I read your comment. You pose a good question. I have a brother who is a psychologist. He once held a job where he had to handle the “criminal” element. There is one story in particular that he shared with me. It goes something like this…,

    “They” brought in one man that was extremely violent. He was immediately and effectively tied down to a heavy duty steel table specifically made for this purpose. He was also loaded up with “thorazine,” which was supposed to calm him down. They put him in a large room, locked the doors, and let him “sleep it off.”

    Somewhere around midnight the staff down the hallway heard some loud banging on those locked doors. They discovered that the guy strapped to the table was on his feet, still strapped to the table! He bent the table somehow, and was using his head and the table as a battering ram against the doors. My brother swore the guy had to be demon possessed. But I’m sure that statement didn’t make it into any reports.

    Very scary!

  11. Gregory Brown says:

    Bob,

    There is another guy that visits a different web site. His name is Paul. I’m not absolutley sure, but I think this guy has been plagued by “orbs” for about 13 years now. “Denmaster,” who is the web site administrator, and a few others are trying to help Paul.

    I already sent the URL for your story to Denmaster. Now I’m posting their URL so you might read about Paul’s condition.

    http://phantomsandmonsters.wetpaint.com/thread/3037429/Ghost+Orbs+or+Alien+Visitations

    CareTaker, if I’m stomping around messing things up by posting this kind of information, I hope you understand what I’m trying to do. This other fellow, Paul, needs help.

    • Caretaker says:

      “Gregory” most of the time links are removed from comments (because of spammers) but this one we will allow.

  12. Jamie says:

    Wow thank you for your story, I have a brother in prison for several bank robberies, but he has been in and out of jail for years.
    He acts normal sometimes, and acts completely differnet at other times, sometimes at just the drop of a hat.
    we have a history of schizophrenia in our family, and I believe some of these “generational curses” need to be broken… just waiting for his to be.
    Thank you so much for posting this story, it gives me much hope :)

  13. Bob says:

    Hello everyone, and thank you for the kind replies. If anyone has a question, the easiest way to contact me would be through the forum that the moderator posted. Simply go to my thread and ask away.

  14. eyepriestess says:

    Gregory,

    You offer some really comforting advice to Bob, i hadn’t heard about this story until i read it last night. I wasn’t sure what to make of the story at first since it involved someone losing their life. But i saw past that as i realise what demons are capable of and as i said before, i VERY OFTEN wonder what i would have turned out to be if the posession had worked.

    Bob,

    I believe this story and hope that you, Bob can realise that what you did was not really you, you had no control over your body at the time. I know when i was being posessed that the demon or whatever it was had already started manipulating my body within seconds. It felt like my lungs were being squeezed with hands, i could actually feel this and i couldn’t breathe. I think this happened in order to stop me praying to God for help, but of course there is the mind and i used that to pray instead, which worked and ‘it’ was (it felt like) pulled from me.

    Any other readers who haven’t had any kind of paranormal experience will most likely doubt yours and my story, but there are demons – now more than ever and people do need to become aware of their existance and avoid attracting them. But more importantly, there is God who is there to help you all!

    Gregory,

    the account of your brother witnessing the psyciatric patient is very scary! My sister-in-law once got a work placement during her uni course in a psychiatric hospital and decided against working in one after about a month there. Her words (and she’s not into the paranormal) were, some of the people seemed to have no souls, like they were posessed. She commented on how the eyes seemed to have nothing behind them.

    God bless you Bob!

  15. NimNod... the She Goat.... says:

    Wow, excellent read.

  16. jk says:

    Bob,

    That “crazy grace” is indeed amazing isn’t it. Your testimony is extremely powerful and will help many people. We all n eed to remember that we do notstruggle against flesh and bones but against powers and principalities. We are constantly in abattle against evil. I hate that you and the others involved had to go through what you all did, but you now have the living God residing inside of you and your testimony will undoubtedly

    That was weird. Anyway your testimony will undoubtedly bare much fruit for Christ and store up many treasure for you in Heaven.

    Count It All Joy, J.K.

  17. Jae says:

    Wow man, I’m really sorry you had to go through something like that. I mean I’m glad you’re getting the help you need now and everything turned out better for you. But you took another life in a way where you had absolutely no control over it because of your possession. A life that you didn’t want to take [not that you would want to take a life in general]. This person meant something to you; that’s so sad. I would never wish anything like this upon anyone. I’m so sorry again. Always remember, what doesn’t kill you will only make you stronger. And pain is just weakness leaving your body. GOD Bless…

  18. TheLostSoul says:

    i am glad

    hope

    bob is well

    bye

    still
    not
    sure

    if

    possesion
    is
    truly
    real

    bob
    was

    depressed
    and
    suicidal

    he also

    didn’t
    even

    get enough

    sleep
    own fault

  19. Elle says:

    Thanks for sharing this, Bob. It is such a deeply profound story that I’m sure that it will move everyone who reads it in many different ways. I’m glad that you found the support you needed and that you find your redemption in faith.

    Personally, I’m not religious, but you set me thinking about the bible and I finally get why it has been such an important book. Thank you for that, brother.

    I hope that the rest of your life is a happy one.

  20. Kinkle says:

    amazing story.

  21. Paul says:

    I d fellow paul i dont need help im showing u what i have in my house ,plus what i have been hearing for ages and now showing u,there is no help so how can u ask 4 help if d goverment wont publise what is happerening ,look for your self proof of a phenomen,D thing is called control ,,,NOTHING LIKE MY STORY

  22. Bob says:

    TheLostSoul:
    I agree, it was my own fault. There was a long line of things I should have, could have done. I agree with you.

    However, I will add a post I posted on the forum:

    “I agree 100%: that the most reasonable first cause-response to something seemingly demonic (including those things that are “real” to that person) is some brain oddity, illness, etc.

    We cannot know for sure if something is physical or spiritual. Best let the physical be dealt with first. There are rare situations, however, where the physical and mental-health solutions simply break down, and any guess by the doctor/scientist during this time becomes no more realistic, logical, or helpful than some priest or psychic estimation. When a situation reaches that stage, though it is still likely that everything is being caused by some brain oddity, the ancient mythology, or even biblical demonology starts to make a lot of sense. Some, including myself, have at this point been entirely cured, restored, some would say almost in a miraculous way, through this method dealing with things that “don’t exist.” It is also possible, honestly, that still all of this, including the restoration, is simply caused by the extraordinary unknown powers of the brain. It is truly possible.

    But when voices, lights, moving objects, sounds, are seen by those other than the “mentally-ill,” removing the subjective into the objective, when that mentally-ill person does things that should not be humanly possible (and I am not thinking of super strength like a mother has for a wounded child,) and it is witnessed by others, the “everything is material and there is no spiritual” paradigm starts to come into question. Even then, it is still possible that all this is some brain-event, some happening of the evolutionary unknown, some mentally-inspired kinetic power, etc., but it then becomes no more than pseudoscience, and offers nothing a priest or pastor or psychic does not already offer.

    Scientific merges with and touches the spiritual. But there does come a point, as I had to experience myself, after being examined, tested, and investigated by a few of the best doctors/psychs/neurologists in the U.S. (though they too, could all be misinformed, wrong, etc. as has happened throughout history,) where dealing with what is going on via an older, more spiritual method, makes a lot of sense. It also can work, beyond belief.”

    Above is a post I wrote on the forum. My point it this, yes, it was my fault, I am not nor would I ever deny this. That is simply an opinion of those who feel any explanation for a crime equals an excuse. I am giving no excuses, I am simply describing.

    I experienced things, and those around me witnessed them, that could not be explained reasonably through natural methods. One Example: During this long downward process, I became obsessed with spiders. Now this is a common thing with paranoia. Things got weird when I could hear them, sense them, and find them anywhere in the house, and even through closed doors. Member close to me witnessed this, and later reported it to the doctors during the investigation. I never pointed this out to them, they simply saw me being obsessed with spiders, reacting to something, and then going directly to the spider to kill it…all around the house. They recalled me asking them, “Do you hear that? The spider.” Now, as stated above, there could be a rational explanation to this, but advanced doctors tried to, and ended up simply saying “We have no clue, they must be lying.” This is one example. There are others, but I am not comfortable in writing them down or even thinking of them anymore.

  23. angel zea says:

    wow i think your story is true and yes i believe u
    it most of been though been through all that..

  24. NimNod... The She Goat.... says:

    @ pAUL……..Right on!

  25. Bob says:

    Good look in your investigations Paul, I never said our experiences were similar. Hope everything turns out okay.

  26. anna says:

    thanks for the story Im glad your better now but you killed someone I cant believe that someone that didnt deserve that.but i some people say to forgive and forget how can you but after reading the restof the story I do feel bad that you were going through that.people say turn to the bible and you will get your anwers I am glad you got help like I sad but one thing I am curious is what about the family of the person who you killed did you ever talk to them about feeling bad or what.what you were going through was bad but I didnt know it was that bad im glad you didnt take your life im glad your alive and well thanks for the story.

  27. anna says:

    i am wondering how ur doing.i know u prob wont write back but that fine.how are things since u wrote this story?i was kind of not really mean but i was mad at u for what had happened to the person you killed,and i read some comments and i feel bad.its like i was mad for something u didnt really know what u were doing.but everyone makes mistakes.i always have said to ppl u do the crime u do the time and of corse u did the time and no offence im glad u did it.ppl should be punished for there doing,i am sorry and and i do forgive u.for what u have done.i hope everything is good and smile god loves u.always will.

  28. Bob says:

    Anna, I am doing fine, thanks for asking. I understand your view, and I take no offense. There is no need to condemn or forgive, you were not involved. Things are good. There is no need to try and explain my actions either. I wrote what I did so that others in a similar situation could relate and possibly use it for their advantage. I understand if you were taken aback or offended in anyway, but I did not write it for you, to be honest.

    For those out there in the internet world seeking answers, those who have experienced the “depths of satan,” please follow my advice. Or, if you have a family member showing signs, please follow my advice. The world will quickly confuse you into a known category, a category that likely does not apply in your case, and may cause more harm than good. But letting things go, letting things pass by, that will cause the most harm either to others or to the individual struggling. For the.0000000001% out there that this applies, good luck and know you are not alone.

    • AnNa bites back says:

      i know you didnt write it for me,thats how i felt.thanks for commenting me back.since its been 4 months since you wrote back how are you now?i hope your still good.=)

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