Should I Worry About Daughters Imaginary Friend?

My daughter is 3 1/2. Her “imaginary friend” who has been popping up from time to time is now back again, stronger than ever.

My mother, who was helping me raise my daughter, just passed away about a week ago now. Is there any connection with my daughter’s “imaginary friend” (who I thought I had figured out) coming back into the picture and my mother’s passing? I’m afraid if I don’t get a grip on this now, it could turn into something serious if it is indeed a spirit or ghost of some sort.

Asked by Stephanie

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24 Comments
  1. Hello Stephanie, I am sure there will be some good responses to your question. In the meantime I just wanted to point out a couple links:

    //www.trueghosttales.com/imaginary-friends.php

    http://www.squidoo.com/imaginaryfriendorghost

  2. Hello Stephanie,
    The imaginary friend could be a ghost, but it could also be your daughter’s way of coping with the loss of her grandmother. It is just a theory I have. At her age, she doesn’t quite understand the concept of death, and where she has had this “imaginary friend” for a while now, it maybe a way of keeping consistancy in her life, because she doesn’t know where grandma went and can’t understand why she isn’t coming back. The imaginary friend could be giving her comfort. It is always possible that it could be a spirit. I have also heard people say that at that age, children can see their spirit guides and guardian angels because their souls are newly into their bodies. You never know.
    @ caretaker: great links and to Stephanie, I hope those links are helpful!

  3. Hi, you should figure out if its still the same friend if it not it could be a ghost or a way of coping p.s. to the person. Who posted above me no one has a comsept of death we haven’t fellt it personly

  4. @ unknown kowledge:
    I think you misunderstand me; The consept of death I speak about is the ability that three year olds do not possess because of the developemental stage they are in. As far as this poor child is concerned, Grandma just “went away” she has no idea that her Grandma’s body is no longer living nor does she understand why her grandma will never come back. All this poor child knows is that someone who was there all the time is no longer there now and she does not know why. You get the concept of death because you know exactly what happens to a person when they die, and I am not talking about where they go after, but just physically what happens and you also know why they are never coming back. No, I can’t be 100% sure what happens after, but I think I have a good idea. It is just my observation that this child may be using the imaginary friend to provide some consistancy and comfort to herself because she does not yet have the concept or understanding of what EXACTLY happened to her Grandma. Imaginary friends can also just be the result of a creative mind. A ghost may or may not be the reason an imaginary child exists. Here are some links to read about the stages of grief in children and their basic growth and developemental stages.
    http://www.hospiceoflancaster.org/_documents/Bereavement/Understanding%20the%20Developmental%20Stages%20of%20Grieving%20Children.pdf

    http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/social_and_emotional_growth_from_age_3_to_4_pbs.html

  5. @ Stephanie:
    Have you by chance tried grief counselling? It may be helpful for you and your daughter, since losing someone so important to both your lives. It can only help. Whether or not her imaginary friend is a ghost or not I can’t be sure, but maybe with couseling the occurances of the immaginary friend might lessen or even stop. I wish you luck, and just maybe there isn’t anything to worry about with this immaginary friend.

  6. Hello Stephanie,

    My name is Ama and when I was growing up I had an imaginary friend, or so my parents thought .. her name was Jenny Lubba (jenny, love her). When I was older, and understood more, I knew her to be an angel, a Gabriel .. we used to do everything together, and she looked like a child, just like me. It used to scare the blazes out of my family. :-)

    What does your daughter’s ‘friend’ say to her, tell her to do, or even suggest? Is there ever anything harmful in the ‘visit’? If she is always happy when the ‘friend’ is around, I don’t think I would worry about it. Your daughter might also be able to see spirits, and might have befriended a child spirit. Again, as long as she’s happy in the contact, there’s no problem. If she feels tired, sick or sad after the visit .. then I might suggest some action to clear your house and or your daughter’s energy.

    That your daughter’s friend has come back just after her grandmother has died isn’t surprising. As Luna and unknown.knowledge have said, the visitor might be there for comfort, just as your angels are gathered around you to help, if you want them to. Your family is grieving, and you are all loved very much.

    You can check me out under Victorian Paranormal Connection on the right on this page under friends .. if I can help in any way you can write to me here, or from there.

    Love & Peace
    Ama Nazra

  7. See! I knew Ama would have a good answer! ;) I never experienced having an imaginary friend when I was younger, but I do believe that young children can see spirits and Angels easily because their Souls are newly incarnated into their bodies. As far as grief counseling, it can never hurt, and ruling out the obvious possibilities before assuming the paranormal is only common sense. Ama may very well be right, and this could be your daughters guardian Angel or a friendly child spirit. Just follow her advice and pay attention to your child during and after the interactions. Like Ama said, if she is happy and otherwise seems undisturbed by the visit, it is probably nothing to worry about. Best of luck!

  8. Good answers, Luna.

    Love & Peace
    Ama

  9. @Stephanie: I have found some links that I am providing, below, that might be helpful to you!

    http://www.indiaparenting.com/raising-children/125_333/imaginary-friend.html

    http://www.supernatural-fan-wiki.com/page/Imaginary+friend

    http://www.suite101.com/content/psychic-kids-a72691

    Just a few sites!! lol!! Some of these may give you some better insight on what could be going on! best of luck!

  10. this is a sensitive stage of age. children say somethings which are wonder. his/her mind is capable for imagines I remember it was a baby about 3 mounts age , her grandmother was passing from there usual . when that baby saw her suddenly scared and began screaming and crying and her body became hard and convulsive. what you think about ? why a 3 month baby must be afraid from a human ( her grandma) ? what did she had seen ? whether it was only an imagine or other thing ? whether that thing was along her grandma or in her ? how a 3 month baby can understand danger and dangerous ?I never understood she scared from what ? but knew the babies and children alarmed about unobservable things and have a dynamic mind hereon. nonetheless they can’t find out what is it and can’t determine what must do they do therefore they show their disability by screaming or crying. of course a children about 3 1/2 years can talk about his problems but she can’t understand how resolve it and how come out from it . you have to talk her.Tell here “what you see is only an imaginary view “until she believe and also keep her nearby yourself and tell her some interesting story alternately and also amuse her by some useful games and hobbies and lead her to some public place like parks that there are some children to play and perform these continual.
    be succeed

  11. 3 knocking ! I have never heard about that . knocking may be true but the number of knocking is not a certain and specify thing.some houses my have one or a few demons and these demons may move stuffs or knock at things or even shoot those out in floor but 3 time is not a rule or norm. I’m not agree with this opinion ” 3 knocked is sign of dying and when it happened one of the family is in passing away state ” this idea is similar to superstition no paranormal. the event that has explained J.Riez may have few root :
    1-Their son had been sad and angry about his parent discussion and wanted shocked them to cut off that argue and joined them.
    2- may some wind or air shockwave caused to that sound
    3- may a slight earthquake caused shaking a thing in room ( example that glass )
    4-A demon has done that knocking.

  12. Hi Manss,

    I doubt the 3 month old saw her grandmother. A child of that age is still connected very closely with heaven. They can easily tell the difference between good and bad energy. Even her grandmother as a lost soul is not bad energy, just confused. The child must have been reacting to something else, if it wasn’t simply ill.

    My parents tried the ‘its only imaginary’ path with me. It only added to my confusion. Jenny was definitely not imaginary, and she was my friend, and I knew it.

    It’s hard to walk the line between what is good for our kids to know, and what isn’t. I downplayed the weird stuff when my children were young. My daughter grew into her gifts, and my son ignores them .. which is happier, healthier and more balanced as a person .. my daughter. She feels the energy swings of the world, and understands what is happening. My son, on the other hand, feels the stuff and closes his mind. I love them both dearly. They are both gorgeous in their own ways.

    Love & Peace
    Ama

  13. your daughter is probably talking to a child that lived in the house long ago does her friend have a name

  14. She probably pretends she sees her. It could possibly be something paranormal, but I wouldn’t know. I know it’s a dumb idea but it’s what I think it might be.

  15. Even if it is a ghost or spirit of some sort it sounds flippant but really what is the big deal?
    I saw my first ghost at 4.
    The fact is ; there is not a demon or evil spirit around every corner.
    The media and misinformation give those beings alot more press than they deserve and unwittingly more power.
    Is she changing her behaviour?
    Is she doing things they aren’t her and claiming her imaginary friend told her to do it?
    At the end of the day if we presume it is an entity of some description your daughter needs to be empowered, that she doesnt have to do everything it says or suggests.
    If you had a naughty neighbour’s child teaching your child ‘ bad habits ‘ you would tell the parents or stop the children mixing with each other.
    Parents tend to feel a bit helpless when the imaginary friend suggests ‘ Lets cut up teddy ‘. So boundaries have to be set whether the friend is imaginary or not – if the imaginary friend is suggesting ‘ naughty things ‘ then it has to made clear that they are ‘ naughty’ and their (ghost) mum will smack them too! You don’t have to tolerate it either – if you believe it is a child spirit tell it any ‘ naughty behaviour ‘ won’t be tolerated and speak out loud and mean it, just like you would if a neighbour’s child was visiting.
    Watch and listen and observe.
    Don’t scare your daughter unecessarily – if a child spirit has genuinely attached itself to her its unfortunate if they were a brat when alive – they’ll still be a brat when dead.
    So there has to be boundaries.
    If you are afraid – this will transfer to your daughter very quickly and anger/ fear etc are negative power packs.
    Both you and your daughter are in control at all times.
    My mum didn’t know what to make of me seeing my dead grandfather so I was kind of left to work it out on my own – he was my ‘ imaginary friend ‘!

  16. Hello Ama

    don,t doubt about what I said about that 3 month old baby , I saw that occurence by my own eyes. also her grandma was a kind and good woman , solemn , brave , traditionalist , wise but very serious and sometime violent and I had never seen any sign of badness psych in her but I don’t know why her grandbaby while saw her at that moment scared all of a sudden ?That baby had scared so that her mother wasn’t able to calm her.
    generally I believe in childhood time it is better children learn more about sensible things than hidden entities but if they ask from this subjects we have to explain about those moderately

  17. I beg your pardon, Manss, I thought you meant the grandmother was a spirit, and the baby saw her.

    Does the baby still react the same way to the grandmother? It might be a co-incidence that the two events happened together. Or the lady could be possessed, given her behaviour, but unless it is a continuing problem, its probably not the case. Children born into the world these days are very aware of the spiritual planes, and entities floating about in it. Far too sensitive, in my opinion. It is often a challenge to cope with very negative energy days, and the little ones .. don’t have the conscious knowledge, or years of experience, to help them feel safe.

    Love & Peace
    Ama

  18. Dear Ama
    That event was about a few years ago , as I know she is now a teenage and her grandma passed away and that event occurred once. as you told which her grandma may
    has possessed, no I knew her well , she was a good believer and worshiper woman and as I know and feel possessed person she wasn’t so.

    be glad

  19. Hi Steph,

    I recently lost both parents, Mum in Feb and Dad in Feb last year. So I completely understand your grief and wanted to let you know there’s a great support network around you here also. The majority of visitors to this website are lovely, wonderful people, who would be only too glad to listen if you need to talk, or advise if you need advice or to just bounce off. I am truly sorry to hear of your mothers sad passing, and hope you and your little girl find the strength to do what she most likely wanted you to do, live your life.

    The advice given here is second-to-none. Ama’s helped me out a couple of times. But I’d watch out for that Caretaker dude…. (LOL just kidding CT)

    Love from one Steph to another Steph xx

  20. Babies, and animals can sense when people are off. Want to know if someone is ok or not watch them around animals, watch how animals and children act around them. Generally speaking they will know before you do because we are so out of touch with nature we dont even recognise it.

    As far as your child having an imaginary friend you said it. Imaginary friend there is nothing to worry about. If you child claims their imaginary friend was the cause of something, make sure they are held repsonsible for anything they do that happens. dont let them say my imaginary friend made me do it.

    Usually a lonely or only child will make up the imaginary friend because they cant blame anyone else for something they did and sometimes especially if you act like it bothers you is a way for them to get attention.

  21. @girlRacer great advice! Ama is really good and she is experienced as well. You are very right; there are alot of very caring and concerned people on here willing to help out! :)

  22. i believe that all imaganary friends are spirits. I believe this because It is a inherent ability to see spirits and doesnt go away till you are in school and are taught to see in a specific way.

  23. It is really called a familiar. People that have grown up with them are usually deceived in many different ways. It normally starts with a lower level demonic spirit. It waits and listens and learns. With small children it will always manifest as another child as to not scare the child. It may say it was killed in an accident or that it is an angel. It tries to become your best friend. It tells you things that make you think you are hearing the future all sorts of things to keep you from figuring out that it is a deminic spirit and bent on taking you to hell. See demonics must have a host or they may be cast back into the abyss. The weeker entities that do not have enough power for a frotal assault and possession, use deception. Once you have accepted them then you give them a legal right to be with you and the only way out is exorcism and deliverence. So the best thing to do is err on the side of caution and take her to a deliverance minister or priest and get this thing taken care of. If she is young it has no legal right to her since she cannot make that decision so the clergy should be able to rid her of it fairly easily. If you would like to read up on this type of “familiar”. Get Father Malachi Martin’s book Hostage of the Devil. There is an excerpt in the book of a true case call”Jimsie and Uncle Ponto”. It started the same way, with a lonely only child and built into a battle that he finally sought help for in his 30′s and was delivered by the name of Jeesus from this oppressive spirit. The one key way to know is that these spirits seem to always have the kids best interest first, that is part of the deception. They will also concoct a situation in which they make the kid believe that they have somehow saved the kids live or that they are theonly ones that love the kids. They will tell them that their parents hate them and all sorts of stuff to alienate the person from all that they love. The main goal is to seperate the kid or person from a loving relationship with Christ Jesus and eternity in Heaven. They will keep them from going to a proper church and learning the truth of who God is and what Christ has done for them. Handle it now. Tell her to say Jesus help me when she sees it and to tell you what happened. If it got mad and disappears-demonic. There are many adults alive today that still have these familiars living with them and ruling their lives and eventually, if the do not seek the proper help, will die having never been cleansed by the preciaous blood of Christ. In those cases, score one for satan.

  24. One entity does not a demon make. And there is nothing in this story to say that this entity is evil, on any level. It could simply be her ‘imaginary friend’.

    Don’t go looking for demons everywhere, JK .. you might start finding them.

    Love & Peace
    Ama

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