Well it all started for me when I was just 16 and I had a brother of 13. I had a dog called Sheba, she was a black cross terrier and spaniel, I loved her to bits she used to sleep in my bedroom every night, always against my wardrobe. It felt comforting most nights because I knew she was there and I knew she loved me in a way but she was old and she became ill and started losing the use of her legs, she had some sort of abscess in one that could not be cured and at the age of 14 the vet didn’t see that she would cope at that time in her life. The thing was she had been with me all my life that I remember and I didn’t want to let her go, but one day I had no choice it was up to my parents they woke me up one morning and asked me to do something that they couldn’t do and as I was the one that loved her most thought it would be better for me and that was for me to say goodbye. When I got her lead she was all excited about going out hopping around on the legs she could use. Little did she know what was happening, she was so happy. I remember it to this day and I’m still upset just by writing this.
All I think about is that took her to let her die and it kills me, well anyway I got her there and they took her away from me to give the injection she did not want to leave but had to let her go it was the hardest thing at that age I ever had to do, I will admit I cried all the way home carrying an empty lead I couldn’t believe no-one went with me, from than on I became quite rebellious with my parents I was getting drunk at weekends with mates and going home and having arguments with them, I got a girlfriend called Catherine and my brother had a girlfriend but I can’t remember her name. Things started happening at home and eventually my mum and dad split up, unfortunately me and my brother couldn’t go with mum so we had to stick it out with dad.
The thing that happened next was my dad turned to the drink and started taking everything out on us for weeks. so we where out most of the time, when he was out at work one day I painted my whole room black with a white gloss mantle, my brothers girlfriend came round and refused to go into my room when we was asked why she said she saw a black dog, I didn’t think nothing of it at the time but when I was sleeping in there I heard things that reminded me of my dog and to be honest it, forget my language shit me right up, I never slept in that room again, I always slept upstairs in the lounge watching TV since then I don’t sleep much still know.
There was one day and I don’t know what brought it on my brother had his girlfriend staying around and some friends he knew but he started going mad in his room and smashing things up with his fists so we called 999 because he has a heart condition and we all went to the hospital with him but they found nothing wrong but they wouldn’t let him leave without parental supervision so me and the friends left and his girlfriend came onto me but I did nothing about it, to be honest it would have been very nice but she was too young for me at the time.
Anyway two years on I got married to Catherine who was my girlfriend at the time everyone was there the whole family my grandparents, father, mother cousins, friends, but unfortunately 2 years down the line we divorced I really wish it could have worked, When granddad died I started living in squatts, I felt like I was letting everyone down and I still am, I started working in a club called The Volt in Exeter. I started taking drugs then e’ss and base and then to get down at the end of the night I used to smoke but things got from bad to worse there was one night I was asleep in bed and I woke up and I could not move I tried to shout but no-one heard me all I could do was see through my own eyes but the thing was I saw nothing, it was the fear running through me that made me fight through. I think. Maybe it was a warning from my grandparents I don’t know.
Why was I pinned? Why scare me like that? It’s not the only time though 6 month ago I was sleeping in Gary’s room and I woke up to see a little creature running up the curtain I tried to scream to Gary and look but he could not hear me and I could not move to hit him to wake him up and he was only next to me so what is there to explain this. I tell you what it is all true I just hope you don’t see it because it would freak you out. I don’t sleep til daylight anymore honest truth…
Sent in by Richard Davis, Copyright 2010