Witch Jokes

Here is a collection of witch jokes for you to enjoy

  • Q: What do little witches like to play at school?
    A: Bat's cradle !
  • Q: What happened to the witch with an upside down nose?
    A: Every time she sneezed her hat blew off !
  • Q: What happened when the witch went for a job as a TV host?
    A: The producer said that she had the perfect face for radio !
  • Q: What kind of music do witches play on the piano?
    A: Hag-time !
  • Q: What is old and ugly and can see just as well from both ends?
    A: A witch with a blindfold !
  • Q: Why did the witch join the football club?
    A: Because she heard they were looking for a new sweeper !
  • Q: What is the best way of stopping infection from witch bites?
    A: Don't bite any witches !
  • Q: What should you expect if you drop in on a witches home unexpectedly?
    A: Pot luck !
  • Q: What do witches sing at Christmas?
    A: "Deck the halls with poison ivy...." !
  • Q: What is old, ugly and blue?
    A: A witch holding it's breath !
  • Q: What do you call a witch that climbs up walls?
    A: Ivy !
  • Q: Why was the witch late for the party?
    A: She'd lost her witch-watch !
  • Q: What do you call a witch with one leg?
    A: Eileen !
  • Q: What is old and ugly and goes beep beep?
    A: A witch in a traffic jam !
  • Q: Why is a witch like a candle?
    A: They are both wicked !
  • Q: Why did the witch keep turning into Mickey Mouse?
    A: She kept having Disney spells !
  • Q: Why did the witch wear yellow stockings?
    A: Because her grey ones were at the cleaners !
  • Q: What goes cackle, cackle, squelch, squelch?
    A: A witch in soggy shoes !
  • Q: What usually runs in witches' families?
    A: Noses !
  • Q: What goes cackle, cackle, boom?
    A: A witch in a minefield !
  • Q: What happens to witches when it rains?
    A: They get wet !
  • Q: What is black, old & ugly and has four wheels?
    A: A witch on a skateboard !
  • Q: What do you call an old hag that lives by the sea?
    A: A sandwitch !
  • Q: What is the difference between a musician and a dead witch?
    A: One composes and the other decomposes !
  • Q: What do you get if you cross an owl with a witch?
    A: A bird that's ugly but doesn't give a hoot !
  • Q: Why did the witch go to the psychiatrist?
    A: Because she thought everybody loved her !
  • Q: Why won't a witch wear a flat hat?
    A: Because there is no point in it !
  • Q: What do you call a witch that stays out all night?
    A: A fresh air freak !
  • Q: What do you get if you cross a witch and an iceberg?
    A: A cold spell !
  • Q: Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween?
    A: Because there are so many witches sweeping the sky !
  • Q: What do you call a witch by the side of the road with her thumb out?
    A: A witchhiker !


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